2000-12-15
feeling kinda
ay caramba. it's just one of those days. all of a sudden, Christmas is barely a week away. i just finished licking all my cards (actually, the envelopes) - blech. nastyass tasting gum adhesive. i feel like a peanut butter dog. you know, when you feed a dog peanut butter, and they just lick and lick and lick and... you get the idea.
i've got way too much gift shopping to do, and no idea what to get for a few people. if you're one of those problem people, be sure to drop me a line and give me a hint, would you? the elf workshop would really appreciate it. i just looked at my gift list and realized that i have nearly as many animals as people to shop for. how funny is that? and i'm not sure if i mean funny ha-ha or funny odd.
i have come to terms with the fact that there are just some people to whom i will forget to mail cards, and some addresses i won't be able to find. them's the breaks, and it's not worth making myself crazy. and for once, i might not actually bake for Christmas. calm down, calm down - i'm still making the walnut cups! of course, the perennial favorite is one of the most pain in the ass recipes. isn't that always the way? but really... it's 10 days. and i don't have time. i could wear myself out staying up late and baking like a madwoman, but i don't think so. nope. just a few batches of my favorites, and a gingerbread house, maybe a few loaves of bread for those hard-to-buy-for ones, doggy biscuits for the dogs (naturally) and mice. i found the cutest damn recipe last week, where you make chocolate mice with licorice string tails, and little almond ears, and they're just so cute you want to eat them up! fortunately, that would be appropriate. i've heard people say that little kids are so cute you just want to eat them up... clearly, these are people who have never changed a diaper. i mean, if that's the creamy nougat filling, no kid will ever be charming enough to look edible. besides, where did the Hansel and Gretel witch complex come from, anyway?
if you haven't guessed yet, i'm a *leeeetle* punchy this afternoon.
there are two people in my life that i'm kinda worried about right now. one is my sis. one of her colleagues was murdered last week. this wasn't a workplace rage kind of thing, but it still scares me, and makes me want to wrap her up in a big protective blanket (you know, the kind with special powers to keep your loved ones safe). you never think that something so violent will happen to or around people you know. when it does, it's about as unsettling as it gets. because then you start to think, what other bad things can creep into our lives? and how do we stay safe?
the other, as you may know if you've been reading, is my honey. today was the day all the nastiness went down at work. they fired nearly everyone, and are gearing down the company while simultaneously praying for a miracle that will let them salvage the product. he just called, and sounds truly defeated. it couldn't have been easy to deal with the situation. and there just isn't anything you can say, is there? i mean, how many ways are there to say - 'dude... that sucks.' not that many. i'm hoping that he finds his job-hunting groove soon, and the karma flows his way; he's eminently employable, but a little luck never hurt.
so... i'm worrying about them (one of my many talents), stressing about not doing everything perfectly for the holidays, working on just stepping back and appreciating what does happen, trying to manage my anger at the ex-girfriend who hasn't even uttered so much as a peep of an apology, and fussing about what to get for some of my giftee people. pretty much where a lot of us are this time of year, no? i think this is why January pretty much blows, from my point of view. there's all this stress and planning and running around, and then it's just January. cold, dark, uninspiring January.
boy, i just re-read this, and it's kinda rambly, isn't it? well, par for the course today. not sure if i'll get an entry in tomorrow, as i'll be running around like the proverbial headless chicken shopping and getting ready for the party. oh yeah - get this - i triple booked myself for tomorrow night - two parties and a work shift. i'm an idiot. begged off the work shift, have to go to the company party, and the second (more fun) party is plan B. we'll make it there, just a bit late, i guess. reminder to self: make some time tomorrow afternoon for girly-girl primping stuff. will be back by Sunday with the next entry. meanwhile, you could drop me a line and tell me how your holiday season is going. c'mon, you know you want to... 8)
