30.10.2001
feeling kinda
Project 19 for Fugue:
It's not whether you win or lose, it's how you play the game. What are the rules in your game, and what is the purpose in following them? What happens if someone breaks those rules? What is your game? (Life? Relationships?)
Welcome to My Playground
i really never do this, because it's bad form to be a copy cat, but i tripped over mechaieh's answer to this, and i'm taking direction from her answer.
1. tell the truth.
2. always wear clean underwear, because you never know when you might be in an accident.
3. never wear white socks with black shoes. never trust anyone who does.
4. listen. listen with your heart as well as with your head.
5. give yourself time to have fun.
6. white shoes and slacks only between Memorial Day and Labor Day. (if you're not a US reader - that roughly defines the summer season.)
7. see the dentist twice a year. your teeth are valuable.
8. be kind to your parents. they've seen you thru a lot.
9. remember to send thank you notes. people need to be appreciated for their efforts.
10. the napkin goes in your lap, not on the table. start with the fork on the outside.
11. try to learn one new thing every day. stretching your mind is a large part of what keeps you alive.
12. make time to listen to live music. it's exhilerating, invigorating, and essential to life. (imagine living without music.)
13. smile at someone for no reason. hold doors open for those coming in after you.
14. make time for your own needs. it's not selfish. you can only give when you have something to give.
15. cement trucks and ice cream trucks are not always friendly.
16. set your standards at a reasonable level; be kind to yourself and give yourself credit for what you accomplish.
17. it's okay for the rules to change.
what is my game... relationships and life are inseparable. we do not exist in a vacuum. the way we tend our relationships determines how our lives will go. there is no 'game' in the sense that i'm not out to win. okay, that's bullshit. i am highly competive. i am always out to win. but winning doesn't mean railroading the people you care about. i compete in the workplace. but i don't compete in relationships.
well, alright, that's not strictly true, either. i'm the oldest of three, and i'm a leo. i feel that there are certain standards i need to meet, not to beat out my siblings, but to be at least as good as they are. it became a disaster when i got divorced and they both got married. they have good families, and i'm the spinster aunt. it's hard to make peace with that. it's not as if i need to have a better life than they do, nor do i want to diminish their accomplishments. but it's hard to take stock of my rules and feel as if i'm doing well.
what i need to remember, what i have to remind myself of more often, is that rules are made to be changed. some of them i get from family, some i get from society, some i set for myself. but all of them are there because i choose them. and if i look at my life and decide that the rules don't work? it's okay to rewrite the rules.
what i find as i get older is that my tolerance and flexibility are increasing. i am more willing to bend or amend the rules to accomodate how we all live our lives. they are not perfect, these lives. we do the best we can. and setting down hard and fast rules does nothing but damage.
just don't ever break rule #1.
