the danish outpost
updated when time and inspiration allow. latest and greatest always in the blog.
quiet progress, loud music

09.03.2002

feeling kinda how a girl feels

this is where i live 40 some odd hours a week

i was fully expecting a wiggly dog to land on me this morning to wake me up. instead, my best friend said bye on the way out, and i slept in because i stayed up way too late watching Vagina Monologues. i had seen it on stage, and it was fascinating to see snippets of interviews with the women who participated. i sort of wish i hadn't stayed up so late, only because i had a hard stop at the end of the day, so the longer i slept, the shorter the work day. can i blame it on having eaten an entire minibag of chocolate filled Oreos? can i? huh?

when i did get up, i took a lovely long shower. i love showering in the huge clawfoot tub, with sun pouring in the window. i like stepping up into the tub, and looking out at the sky, and trying out exotic soaps. that was pretty much the the high point of my morning.

the motivation to crash at her place was to make sure i got into the office, and got things done. i did pretty well, overall. i brought in a little desk book, a thousand paths to tranquility, so i'd have some new inspiration when i needed it. i still didn't tackle major project, but i got a few others out of the way, which feels good. now, i have something concrete and finished that i can hand over to my boss before we start talking about the big project. and that makes me feel a little more accomplished, a little safer, and a little less of a failure.

and my desk feels like an okay place to be, which is part of why i wanted to come in on the weekend. i could spend some time just being there and settling back in. now it won't feel quite so foreign the next time i come in. i think it was a necessary step, to help build myself a safety net.

at the end of the day, i met up with a friend to get some dinner before we went to a show. i was really low energy and not too conversational, for which i felt badly. but honestly, i just couldn't put out much effort. being at work had been tiring, and i was hoping to be able to make it thru the show. unfortunately, the side effect was that i was probably a very boring dinner companion.

i did better when we got to Avalon for Great Big Sea. what a fantastic show - i love these guys, love them, and especially adore the lead singer. he's incredibly handsome, with an impish grin that makes you want to pinch him, and wonderful long hair that makes you want to... well, let's just say i have a weakness for gorgeous boys with long hair. and he kept leaning down between songs to grab his water bottle, then standing up and tossing his hair back. mmmmmmpphhhh! oh mi lord. i almost liked the moments between the songs more than the songs. the show was beyond sold out, which meant that i could sing at the top of my lungs with every damn song and noone cared, because everyone else was doing it too.

on the way home, i had what to this point is the scariest moment yet on the T - a man jumping on rails. i had spotted him when we came down, and without breaking stride, i turned around and went back a few steps. i didn't want to be near a clearly unstable individual. but i just thought he was your average stumbling drunk. but then he threw his fanny pack on the rails. then he went after it.

he got violent when anyone tried to help him, and didn't want to part with his basketball in the process of retrieving the bag. several people finally got him back up on the platform, and security showed up. tragedy avoided.

i was aggravated by a few other people near me, particularly the whiny woman who grabbed my arm and said 'why don't you help him?' geez, lady, i dunno - because there are already 4 guys helping him, and i couldn't pull his weight any better than you? and how jaded is this - my first thought was, 'he damn well better not delay my train.' i've lived wayyyy too long in the city, my friends.

yesterday :: tomorrow

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