i'm so screwed over today. i should have gotten the hint when my doorbell rang this morning. frenchie and i had made plans to walk in to work together, and he was going to call on the way over. no call. doorbell. no shoes. scrungy teeth. massive panic. and that was the way my day launched itself.
and the runway has gotten shorter and shorter... i feel like a prop plane run on rubber bands. i'm just gonna end up in the harbor. if you're familiar with Logan, this makes sense.
i never knew there were so many ways for a project to not work. i mean, i did, but it's a little overwhelming the last few days. none of this would even seem so bad if we were at the start of the project. you introduce a lot of change, things will need to be adjusted. fairly normal. but when you come down to the wire, it seems far more catostrophic than it really needs to be. gah. and i wonder why my shoulder muscles are knotted up harder than iron. at least it'll keep my massage therapist in lattès.
at least i got a few things accomplished last night; my locks are now tamed, and some graphics are done. but damn. by the time i got done with all that, dragged myself home in time to see Denis Leary in The Job, fed my face and watched Once and Again, there was no way i was going to get any writing done. so those are still on my plate. and i *have* to do them tonight. and i still need to get to the bank, and mail birthday presents, and, and, and... gah!
at least my polycarbonate girlfriend, the ever lovely Ani DiFranco, has been keeping me company. right now she's singing Freakshow from To the Teeth.
life in the circus ain't easy
but the folks on the outside don't know
the tent goes up and the tent comes down
and all that they see is the show
and the ladies on the horses look so pretty
and the lions are lookin' real mad
and some of the clowns are happy
and some of the clowns are sad
but underneath there's another expression
that the makeup isn't making
life under the big top
it's about freedom
it's about faking
there's an art to the laughter
there's a science
and there's a lot of love
welcome to the freak show
here we go...
we live to hear the slack-jawed gasping
we live under a halo of held breath
and when the children raise up a giant shield
of laughter, it's like they're fending off death
and we can make something bigger
than any one of us alone
and then the clowns will take off their makeup
and the people will go home
but life on the outside ain't easy
no sequins, no elephants,
no parading around
yeah the tent goes up
and the tent comes down
and they're stuck in this fucking town
you need a lot of love and compliance
welcome to the freakshow
here we go...